Top 16 Pregnancy, Birth and Baby books
So many of you have reached out to ask what books I’ve been sharing/reading through this pregnancy – that I thought I would take some time to write a post of the top pregnancy books that I would recommend so far in my pregnancy reading!
A note also on the books relating to different approaches to mothering in the early stages – it is my personal approach to use these books not as something hard-and-fast to follow, but more as inspiration and ideas for different models that exist and then make my own intuitive decisions when I am in the moment-to-moment of mothering. I think probably there are MANY moments of motherhood when everything you’ve ever read you simply have to chuck out the window (along with your sanity).
This list is by no means complete and if you do have a pregnancy/baby/birth favourite – I’d love to hear it – so please leave a comment below!
HOW TO HAVE A BABY – NATALIE MEDDINGS
When I first knew I was pregnant I messaged a friend of mine Lulu and asked what book she would recommend I get. “How to have a baby” was her answer! What I love about this book is that it is broken down into very easily digestible bite-sized chunks and chapters. (Dare I say – even a boy-partner could read it!). It is incredibly practical (with very useful info for birthing partners – “give them a job!”) and a very down-to-earth, common sense approach to pregnancy, birth and the first few weeks post-partum, which I absolutely LOVE. I love the completely simplified approach to having a baby. Even the “shopping lists” are simplified down to just two invaluable things in the early days: “a good sling and a co-sleeping crib”. This book takes away a lot of the overwhelm of everything – as if you are remembering what it is that you have always known. The years of wisdom and experience within this book is palpable and I’m very excited that Natalie will be my birth doula!
Especially useful: very practical, lovely to read (and look at) and wonderfully simplified and holistic. Totally recommend this book!
WHAT MOTHERS DO ESPECIALLY WHEN IT LOOKS LIKE NOTHING – NAOMI STADLEN.
“What mothers do especially when it looks like nothing” actually formed part of my pregnancy yoga teacher training and I’m so glad that I have read it as so many pregnancy books are focused on the baby, but I think it’s so important to also focus on the mother and the huge identity shift that is taking place! It is a beautifully raw and honest account of motherhood and particularly how there is not really enough language to fully describe what “it” is that mothers actually do – which really is an extremely energetically draining process of continual monitoring, assessment and attunement – often with very little physical ‘outcome’ to show at the end of the day – which can be very difficult and sometimes overwhelming for mothers to try and explain to others/partners.
Especially useful: What I loved about this book is the extremely broad and unbiased spectrum of all things relating to motherhood – from women who felt instant love and connection to their babies to women who felt no instant love and connection to their babies but built it over time. It really does a lot to normalise the full experience of motherhood in all aspects which I think is so important. Such an insightful read for any first time mother!
BOUNTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL, BLISSFUL – GURMUKH
“Bountiful, Beautiful, Blissful” book also formed part of my pregnancy yoga teacher training. It is quite yoga-specific in it’s approach with a big slant to Kundalini style yoga – so it’s not the first book I would recommend – unless you are yoga-inclined!
Especially useful: I love the natural and holistic approach to labour and mothering and the simple kundalini style practices that you can do with your birth partner. What also really stuck with me was the value of taking the first forty days postnatally to recharge and nourish yourself.
YOUR PREGNANCY BIBLE – DR ANNE DEANS
This book for me has been more of a reference book and not something that I have read cover to cover. If I have something that is on my mind regarding pregnancy it is a great reference tool. It is very comprehensive and gives information on just about everything from the types of shopping lists you might need for baby to dominant and recessive genes to the type of perineal tears you could have and the types of episiotomy cuts that might be made. It is, in my opinion, quite a medicalised approach to pregnancy, but very interesting none the less!
Especially useful: as a guidepost to reference anything that you have a query with. I have also found the Ovia App to be very helpful with this – as well as a space for you to personally track any doctors appointments and daily symptoms.
YONI SHAKTI – UMA DINSMORE TULI
Although Yoni Shakti this is not only pregnancy specific it is an incredible tool and resource for everything feminine energy. Yoni-shakti literally translating to “womb-power” and there are amazing yoga practices, meditations, yoga nidra scripts and visualisations which are specific for pregnancy and entire chapters in this amazing book dedicated to pregnancy, birth and postnatal recovery. I often use these practices in the pregnancy yoga classes I teach. As you can see it is very well ear-marked and maybe from the strain in my hand as I’m holding it (or from the first pic where it is lying on it’s side) – it’s a huge book with loads of incredible information from female cycles, feminine energy, pregnancy, fertility, and menopause.
Especially useful: as an incredibly rich resource which taps into thousands of years of ancient feminine wisdom. The yoga nidra scripts are also very useful as a type of hypnobirthing practice.
HYPNO BIRTHING – MAKE YOUR BIRTH BETTER – SIOBAHN MILLER
My wonderful friend Shan sent this Hypnobirthing book to me and I absolutely devoured it! Regardless of the type of delivery you opt for or end up having, the tools and skills in this book are invaluable – not only for labour but for helping to maintain a sense of peace and calm in the early days of motherhood (and life in general!). If you haven’t dived deep into the physiology of birth – then this book is amazing.
Especially useful: Particularly useful are the UP-BREATHING and DOWN-BREATHING techniques for labour – which are identical to the breathing techniques I have learnt and teach in pregnancy yoga classes. Great ideas for visualisations and a practice schedule for you too! Highly Recommended!
INA MAYS GUIDE TO CHILDBIRTH – INA MAY GASKIN
Ina May is often considered the midwife to midwives! This is one of the first books I listened to on audible and I can assure you that listening to other women and their birth stories in the first trimester brought me to tears on more than one occasion!
This is a great book for breaking down the very medicalised practice of childbirth (which is generally a pretty recent thing) and bringing it back to the wisdom of women. It has some great practical tips and tools for labour as well as sharing a variety of different positive birth experiences – many of which are shared from the mother’s perspective or an attending midwifes perspective.
Especially useful: for hearing/reading positive birth stories with lots of practical/ useful labour and birth information too.
THE DAILY SOUL SESSIONS… FOR THE PREGNANT MAMA
My friend Holly sent this book to me – it is a daily insight/thought or thing to ponder in the journey of motherhood. When she sent it to me she said she wasn’t sure how to explain it but some days in the book left her a bit missing. I understand what she is saying! Some days are filled with really soulful and heartfelt things to dive into and other days simply share the average gestation periods of different animals. I suppose not knowing what you’re going to get is what keeps you coming back! They are super quick and easy to read!
Especially useful: for creating a little daily routine for yourself. I have loved taking this book, reading the daily soul session and then doing a meditation and breathing/pelvic floor connection practice as a way to start my day.
THE ESSENTIAL ART OF NOURISHING THE NEW MOTHER – HENG OU
A yoga student replied to one of my mailing list emails to recommend this book to me. I clicked over to the link she sent and within 20 seconds I had ordered. (Probably the quickest I’ve ever ordered anything!) Something about the subtitle “The essential art of nourishing the new mother” and the imagery of this book that made me think i need this RIGHT NOW. It is one of the best books I’ve read and is also another one I would recommend immediately. I have read this book cover to cover and actually I found my bed time was getting earlier and earlier when reading this book as I was making an excuse to go to bed just so that I could read it! There is a whole section of recipes at the end of the book and it did start feeling strange when I was going to bed to read a recipe. But that is how into this book I am!
What I love about this book is the focus entirely on the mother. So many baby books focus on “what to do to look after the baby” with so many different ‘formulas, techniques, strategies’ etc and for me this book just highlighted that when a MOTHER is nourished and feeling calm, grounded and centred – she is more easily able to tap into the intuition that she already possesses in order to look after her baby in the most optimal way. It makes a lot of sense to me!
One note: quite a few of the recipes at the end are meat-based so if you are vegetarian be prepared to make a few swaps. It is based on Chinese principles of warm, wet foods.
Especially useful: for creating your “post-natal plan” which is just as important (if not more!) than you birth plan. The premise being that how you transition into motherhood in those first 40 days sets the tone for how you are as a mother for the next 40 years. Definitely recommend!
BABY SENSE – MEG FAURE & ANN RICHARDSON
My sister in law gave Baby Sense to me and it has been interesting book to read – especially in relation to overstimulating a baby and the sensory load that is appropriate for each stage of development from birth to a year. It has specific guidelines on sleep training and feeding. When I shared about this book on my social media – it was clear that this book is very polarising in terms of the mothers who responded to it! Either mothers are in the camp of “this book saved my life” or “this book made me feel like I was failing”. After listening to “The book you wish your parents had read” on audible I’ve realised that this is likely due to parenting falling into two main camps – “regulator parenting” and “facilitator parenting” which I will explain below! The Baby sense I feel lends itself to those who fall more in the regulator camp.
Especially useful: for learning how to interpret your babies signals and especially for those parents who cope well with structure and routine and like/need very specific guidelines on what to do when.
THE BOOK YOU WISHED YOUR PARENTS HAD READ – PHILIPPA PERRY
I listened to “The book you wish your parents had read” on audible and I really enjoyed it. It outlines two main camps of parenting as “regulator parenting” and “facilitator parenting”. “Regulator parenting” assumes that a baby feels safe and supported when there is consistent routine and structure. It is more parent centred in that, for example, when a night time routine is set – (by the parent), the consistency in a parents perhaps delayed response to the child’s crying trains the child to self-soothe.
“Facilitator parenting” on the other hand is more child centred and assumes that a baby feels safe and supported when it’s needs are consistently met – for example when the baby is consistently soothed by a carer when crying – even at night. Facilitator parenting says that a child does not learn to self soothe when there is delayed response from the parent, but rather it learns to shut down from it’s needs. And rather that through consistent external meeting of its needs through the parent, the baby assimilates this and learns to meet those needs from within aka “self soothing”.
The biggest takeaway from this book, which I think is useful not only for parenting but for relationships in general is learning to “feel with and not deal with” your children. Allowing children’s feelings to be seen, heard and validated creates a very fertile ground for building a strong connected relationship which will continue into adulthood.
Especially useful: for becoming a more conscious parent. For looking at your own triggers and how they may show up in parenting and how you can meet the needs of your children to establish a good emotional foundation well into adulthood. Also DEFINITELY recommend.
Note: there are some useful journaling and self enquiry exercises in this book – and when that is the case I always think a hard copy version is better than an audio version!
THE GENTLE SLEEP BOOK – SARAH OCKWELL SMITH
I’m halfway through listening to The Gentle Sleep book on audible – it was shared with me on IG by Keri as another option in response to The Baby Sense book. As the title suggests it is more gentle in it’s approach and does not give as strict structure, guidelines, or timings as The Baby Sense book and therefore has more scope for a wider variety of parent-baby experience in terms of sleep training.
Especially useful: for those who do not feel strict sleep training is for them or perhaps those who are more inclined to co-sleep or are comfortable with co-sleeping for longer.
THE MISADVENTURES OF A PARENTING YOGI – BRIAN LEAF
The misadventures of a parenting yogi was sent to me by my wonderful friend Holly and it is HILARIOUS. For anyone who is an expecting yogi its a super fun and light read written from a male perspective which is so refreshing! As much as it is a easy-page turner it also includes the basic principles of many different parenting techniques and styles – and has given me inspiration to explore a few others different parenting related books – notably “unconditional parenting” which is next on my to-read list!
Favourite bits of the book: yogi’s partner being in labour for 6 days and them being told by the midwife to go into the next room and ‘have sex as it may speed up the process’ but not to worry as the midwives will be “out of earshot” – the description that follows is just hilarious.
Especially useful: if you are looking for an easy and fun intro to labour and parenting!
MAGICAL CHILD – JOSPEH CHILTON PEARCE
Right before I feel pregnant I did an energy course with John Amaral and one of the authors he recommended was Joseph Chilton Pearce. I browsed through some of his books and this one immediately caught my eye. It is not as much of a light read as say the book above, but I have been SO fascinated by this approach.
The foundations of this book is that a baby moves from “matrix” to “matrix” in order to develop. Matrix being the Latin word for womb. The Matrix provides three essential things for development: Source of Possibility, Source of energy and Sense of Safety in which to explore. The first matrix we all encounter is the womb. (Sperm + egg = possibility, umbilical cord/blood/nutrients = energy, mother’s body/uterus = safety), the next matrix we encounter is “the mother” (or primary care giver), if this Matrix provides the essential three things then development or can occur through inherent intent. The child then moves onto the next matrix (father/ secondary caregiver) – and the process repeats, eventually the world becomes the matrix and then the child itself becomes it’s own matrix – usually towards adolescence/adulthood (provided the needs are met in each stage of matrix up-levelling.)
There is a lot of very fascinating biology and nature/nurture concepts in this book through very interesting studies (hence it takes a bit of concentrating) but to me, it also has an incredibly spiritual undertone of literally the potential of the universe lying within us.
Especially useful: if you love a bit of scientific research this book has incredible studies looking at babies development from across the globe. As well as the effects of the “cascade of intervention” often given in hospitals to labouring women (pitocin, epidural etc) and the effect this has on baby monkeys and their abilities to efficiently nurse and navigate the world around them, when administered to the labouring mother-monkey. (Really interesting!)
THE GIFTS OF IMPERFECT PARENTING – BRENE BROWN
There is nothing like a 4 hour car trip to get (force) your husband to listen to an entire Brene Brown parenting book in one sitting. I adore Brene Brown and her work on vulnerability and this parenting book applies those concepts to the lens of parenting with ten specific “guideposts”.
Especially useful: for realising that parenting is less about the things you “do” or the choices you make as a parent, but rather in the way that you SHOW UP within yourself as a person of worthiness, wholeheartedness and vulnerability in the world – on which your children model their behaviour. Loved listening to this book!
THE DRAMA OF THE GIFTED CHILD – ALICE MILLER
I was unsure as to whether or not to include The Drama of the gifted child book in this list – but it had such a profound effect on me that I thought I would. It was recommended to me by one of my facilitators in a core energetics course I did. It was for my own personal/self development as it is a lot to do with how, when a parent has not found a sense of wholeness within themselves they will use their children and their children’s achievements as a replacement for their own worthiness. A child, who is usually intuitive and picks up on subtle feelings, will then become very adaptive to the desires of a parent and become hellbent on succeeding/achieving and love feels very conditional.
Although it’s not a parenting specific book, I believe that when we are able to truly recognise our own triggers, patterns and behaviours and find wholeness and love within ourselves – we are able to impart that wholeness and love unconditionally to our children. Just as Brene’s book proposes.
Especially useful: if you consider yourself to be an A-type personality or a high achiever and wish to understand where this is coming from so that you can be conscious around it when you are parenting. Alice also has books titled “The Drama of being a child” and “The body never lies”
So I hope that list has been useful to you and that if you are inspired by any of these then definitely check them out! If you have any other parenting/baby must reads then please do let me know in the comments below!
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